we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Pants are for mortals
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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