Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Vodka?
Forever.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
