You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'm getting married
To pizza
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
