I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
