I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
