is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
