Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
