she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I did not marry a roomba.
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