He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
