Well apparently he's into motor boating.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
