Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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