Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
