Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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