i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
