How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
