he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
