Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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