My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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