I hate your face
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
