i already hear my dad disowning me
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
