ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
