so explain again why im purple
no
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I queefed so loud it echoed.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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