Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
