You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
