I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
