but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
