I'm eating all of the evidence.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
