speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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