The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
