i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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