He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I should be sponsored by Trojan
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Found your dick twin last night
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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