You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
