So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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