My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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