i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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