Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
