I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
