it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
