I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
