I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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