I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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