sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Let the clothes fall where they may.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
