Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
