Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
