I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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