I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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