wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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