Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize
