I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
