anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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